move on

was it love?

I dont kn. Now i really dont. First, if it was then the end would have been different. A lot different. Second, there would have been no end at all. Lived happily ever after... din happen. So what was it? And is moving on that easy? I dont know...

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When Mumbai's skyline changed forever

I was no different from any common Indian. Now, I am. Being at ground zero and experiencing all that we all "know" by now makes hell of a difference. We all have de-sensitised ourselves so much that any terror attack of suicide bombing is like any other common occurence if our life, which has no meaning; just an incident, untoward happening which we cannot avert but can turn a blind eye to. Thursday morning was no different. There were no other talks but the terror attack and amidst all the hoopla were some scathing jokes on the entire issue. Until, we came to know that we could go there and get some stories out. I never thought that the following day could change my life, forever. Looking at armymen, ready for their duty and knowing that some of them might not return put me to shame. What exactly was the purpose for their lives? Dying for someone they didnot even know? Or worse, dying for some elite businessmen who wouldnt care less for the country but make money? I saw them laughing and trying to make the moment little light. The air was heavy and they were all calm, knowing what was coming. I am not writing a first person account as many have done that already but would just want to rant. Films take inspiration from real life, but trust me guys what I saw yesterday, no film has even come 10% close to reality. Films always tend to over or underplay the subject. What i saw was just plain business. A business with real emotions and fear. I spoke to one Jawan and asked him, "How much more time?" "A day more," he said. I counter questioned, "Why a day more? Dont you think its too long?" He replied smilingly, "With our each step forward, lot of lives will change forever, we have to think at least 10 times before moving ahead." I was numb. Speechless and spellbound I stood as his words hit me and continue to hit me even now. Just three days ago a friend from London called and asked about the train blasts. I was surprised when she said, "Shubh, I want to ask you something personal. I hope yoi won get disturbed and if you feel like you dont want to answer please tell me and I will stop." I was zapped thinking what is she going to ask?" She asked about the train blasts. Arent we de-sensitised? Yes we are. I laughed at her thinking how stupid? "Why will I get disturbed coz of that?" Now, I do coz today I have understood what those blasts did to my city. And today I understand what this terror attack has done.

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My life, nothin but you

My life is nothing but memories of you

Loved, cared, and stitched with a thread of warmth,

Your heart oozes out.

Sewn with your thoughts

My heart knows nothing but you

My mistakes, errors all just too much to forgive

My life has colors

Noting less than spectacular

With colors as beautiful as you

Painted Red, with nothing less but you.

My aim and life was close to each other

My aim was you and my life was you.

Looking back now, I feel with ribbons of your love

I might hold them together

You were my dream

A beautiful one, envy for others

You, only you, nothing else but you

My dream…

From morning to dusk

This world to death

From laughter to tears

Sorrow to happiness

I see nothing else but you…

Your love is my treasure

Caged in my heart

Eternity, come and go

I am alive because of your love

-- Shubh

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so the time has come. finally

Yes, its done. Over. Dead. The most beautiful thing happened to me is no more. I never expected it to be flowery every day. I knew there will be moments where I would want to suicide, thrash someone out of anger, shout, scream, yell and dont kn what not.

But I never thought that it would be over. It is now. I m upset not because its over. Yes, its true. I m upset about the fact that after two years I couldnt prove to you that I loved you. I couldnt make you understand that my heart beats because of the smile I see on your lovely face. I failed at making you blush when someone said my name in front of you.

I lost at every juncture and I know that. Today I am sure that this is the best thing for us. You dont love me and I dont want you to be claustrophobic. Its a new beginning for us. Wish you a beautiful life ahead and hope that the new guy gives you whatever I couldnt. I wish you never think of me again. I wish you get over the nightmare I gave you. I wish a lovely life for you where tears have place only when happiness is around.

Finally the good thing is that we have something to mutually agree upon. The bad thing is that its the decision to part ways.

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when u kn the date of your death...

Sunday. yes, this Sunday. and its not a great feeling. 4 days. I kn whats goin to happen on taht day and i m preparin myself for that. par hota nahi hai yaar. nahi hota. tears just dont stop. heart is pumping hard. my breathe is shortened and i m choking. my life is coming to an end. a slow end. every second is hard to pass. clock's tick is annoying, it is strikin hard in my mind. no matter how much i m tryin not to think of it the more it is registerin its presence. i never thought this could be it. but this is it and the faster i realise this the easier my death would be...

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a turtle's life

my life has suddenly turned a turtle's. Spending each milli-second is tiresome. tick tock tick tock tick tock.......

There cannot be a bigger punishment than this.

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PROFOUNDITY AT LAST

what does one mean one taking a break? I want to be alone for sometime and see where this is goin? What? I just realised... It means beginning of an end.

Beginning of an end. BEGINNING OF AN END.

Honestly, I never imagined this day. And the more I think of it the more disgust I experience. What am I tryin to realise in this break? Whether I want to be with you or no? Hell, I know this answer. I dont need a "break" to realise anything. I want to be with you.

Suddenly, this whole idea of a "break" seems so odd. WHAT THE FUCK DOES THIS MEAN? Can we stay away from each other? WHO THE FUCK WANTS TO?

SHIT. I CANT BELIEVE WE DID THIS. The profoundity has just shown its colour. This is the beginning of an end. AN end I thought would never come but life does have some serious surprises in store for us.

FUCK. I. CANT. BELIEVE. THAT. WE DECIDED. TO STAY. AWAY. FROM. EACH. OTHER.

I GUESS THIS IS IT THEN.

CIAO.

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so it has begun....

i have realised that I am not the same witty guy I used to be... he isl eft far behind... do I regret? Not really, but I do miss him. Do I want him back? May be not. Why? Because I am happy this way.

Now, if someone feels that i have changed coz I hurt many with my earlier behaviour and I have been forced to "change", I say get a life. I really dont care a damn abt anyone. ANYONE. I have changed coz I felt that change is good. Am I happy, Yes I am.

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expectations...

my expectations are going down... which is a good thing... we all know that expectations cause problems... everytime... I expect... i do.. a lot... its tuff to calm them but I am doing it.. with success... 

yes its true that i m upset... and in this upsetness i m alone... a truth, alas, cant be changed. 

cant even say this as i will be reminded of the bad times i showered upon... 

in silent whispers, i too suffer... but its ok... as i have brought down my expectations. 

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at every step, every juncture, i have failed. two people can be diagonally opposite but what makes the relationship work is that they love and learn to adjust with each others shortcomings. They learn to hold hands and walk when one of them halts. They learn to speak when the other cant.

I may be bad, intentions crooked, aim unrealistic... but loved unconditional.

two sides to a coin, one yours and one mine. which is more correct or more wrong, i m no one to decide... but you are correct I kn. Tried to make evry attempt to change my way. failed. even if i believe that i was changing.. you dont and that is what matters.. change was for me.. but more importantly its for you. With my actions, I m hurting you, every second and couldnt give u a single day of happiness. Life to me is seing a smile on your face and makin you feel that i love you.

may be we wont talk again, may be i ll get back to waht I was, or may be i ll remain waht I am as I may nt have changed at all... whaterver it amy be... My intentions have always been pure, my feelings, sacred.

Havent had a easy life and not blaming anyone for that but myself. May be the sins of my past life will haunt me forever. May be I did something very horrible to someone in my past life taht this is what i got. Dont want to hurt anyone else for my misdeed, I let go of things.

When I wanted to be alone, I never was. and today when I want to be with you, I am not allowed to.
Already sufferin from the punishment for things i did to you, minuscule as compared to waht u went through. Remember you as a breathe of fresh air in my life. Now on, i am choking to death.

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what religion?

do u really need a religion to belong? belong where? to my "community"? to my "friends"? "family"? who?

I dont think we need a religion to "belong" anywhere.

and i relly wanna ask all those who think that they "belong" coz they follow a religion.. what do they get out of their belonging? Day in and day out you too.. like anyone else curse ppl around and earn sympathetic mileages... wtf religion are u talkin abt?

religion is not a ticket to belong... it is just a farce to kill each other...

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I really dont understand wat s the hoopla behind all this... wat blog shud i wrote and what shudnt is complete my prerogative... u dislike something.. pl dont come again... i dont write to satisfy any of you... this is my personal space.. away from all of u...

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b'day... so what?

Birthdays around me are a big deal to me because all the people close to me matter to me. They like to celebrate theirs and I love to see that smile. Being part of that smile is a feeling with no competition. But what about my own b'day?

its true that I too expect that beautiful surprise... although its now been cliche but still a b'day surprise will always be special... but year after year when you know that its not going to happen.. the feeling sinks in... I am happy its my birthday but thats it. I know nothin more than that will happen. So, actually other than a few compliments and may be calls from long lost friends.. its nothign else. Just a date. A special date somewhere deep down in my heart.

Happy to see that this date matters to her... nice to have the 'loved' feeling... But honestly, I dearly miss that 12 am surprises.. although never happened to me ever but I have been a part of many and I know how it feels to be surprised...

phew... may be the time is not right for that to happen... patience.... patience... patience...

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A double century and going stronger

All the cricketers in the world be envy of me! Just 4 days short of a magnificent double century with no indications to halt or stop, I am one lucky chap.

To my sooper-lovely, ultra- beautiful, and ekdum mast gf... I looooooove you...
I know that you have to "bear" with this devil and trust you are doing a fab job! I am quiet ok also!

Every nano-second, milli-second, and the smallest unit possible of time, I think of you you and only YOU. Whatever I am today, its coz of you and whatever I ll be tomorrow, it ll still be coz of you.
You are that inner power in me which makes me fire all cylinders! You are my inner self which makes me what I am. You are my soul which defines me and make me worthy of this beautiful life.

You are the fragrance which freshens my life. Its you you and only YOU which makes me complete and its you who has told me what love is.

I bet today Hanuman will be jealous of me as you are present in me more than Shri Ram in him! :)

Been two years and feels like just two minutes... My dea love... looking forward to make these two minutes into infinite lovely and memorable moments with you.

Just for you... I Love You.

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And The Financial Express does it again!

I mean come on... how can a newspaper doesnt know that its website is so seriously flawed. Do they know that nobody visits their site so why bother?

First they did this and now this.... look at the pic

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Mahagony

I hate Bollywood. I just hate it. Far from reality and going farther every minute. Every film is just too shallow and disconnected. Sometimes I feel that every Bollywood director should turn into politicians as both do the same work. Make us believe in something which is non-consequencial to our lives.
Yes it might be true that money cant buy you everything but without it you cant even take a step closer to whatever that 'everything' is.

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The best reality show!!

Loksabha Tv has managed to give us by far the best reality show ever!!! Just cant take my eyes off the screen!!! Kuddos to our leaders! its funny, suspense and on the edge drama! Woohoo!

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Rabbi: Bilqis (Jinhe Naaz Hai)

My heart beat slowed, my nerves calmed... I was transported into a diff India and I was ashamed of my Indianness. Rabbi has made a laughin stock out of the so called "Idealism and truth" we Indians boast of. if we have even a bit of conscience left in us then we all must listen to this song. Enough said.

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We have gone to the dogs

yes guys i am sorry to say that journalism in India has gone to the dogs. Have a look at the pic in the right column (the man with fiolded hands) and read the caption. Laugh your wits out!
click here to see the pic!

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Sex in space!

Read this story in HT!

Analysis later!

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mistakes are bound to happen, so wat?

i sometime feel why we make mistakes? Obviously we dont kn till the time we are told about them. So does that mean that we are so stiff that even after tryin to think of all the possibilites, some vital infos still are missed resultin in a disaster. WHo is at fault then?

My mind has hit a road block. I really really dont kn what I am doing and how I should go ahead. And this is frustrating. No matter how much I try to calm myself, it just doesnt happen. Living in constant fear of a targic mistake that i may commit i think I am making myself suffer to a great extent.

The solution is not in sight and the ending cant even be thought about at this point.

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takes just a moment

Life is funny. very funny. It takes just one small, irrelevant moment to topple it. Just one moment. There are a few people in our lives without whom everythin else is just so meaningless. And it takes just a moment to either be with them or be alone. I am scared by the thought of not being with her. I just dont know what to do but losing her is not an option. My aim, my focus, my diligence is all because of her and I dont want to be an aimless wanderer...

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My mornings have changed

Its been a drastic change to my daily schedule... A good night sleep seems like thing of the past. And days are turning gloomy with each passing second. Everyday morning I get up early in anticipation of knowing if the previous day was successful. I get up nervous, sweating, banging my head on the walls somehow manage to grab the paper and whoosh! its a bad day.

No astrologer can predict the day I will have as I write the future everyday and get up early to check out the script. turns out bad everyday.

Its discomforting. Am I bad or its just a space constraint? This has become the only question that lingers in my mind... the only one. And honestly, I dont know. I really dont know what the problem is...

I have never in my life experienced peer pressure, this is a damn first time and believe me its very demanding. I am not saying that I have given up. I havent and I will not. I can handle it but just to be in the league without wasting much time is I guess the root problem.

I really need someone to tell me that its ok... Just carry on the way you are. Its just a phase, everyone has the same problems when they start out. I want someone to just believe in me and help me cross this bridge.

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a slow build-up

I dont want to get into the debate of quality over quantity as i think at this point both are suffering in my hands.. however, its frustrating when you track down someone after 4 hours and the person take another 4 hours to respond back as he/she is stuck in a meeting and by the end of the day just write a polite message saying "cannot comment."

Its frustrating. Really.

I guess I need to learn this... the basic premise of the field i dived in. Larger question is about the quantity.. how to maintain that when such unprecendented issues crop up. Any ideas?

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Better off...

A new week.. the mood is upbeat but nervous at the same time.. honestly more nervous thatn I was on the first day. Expectations are rising... So is the enthusiasm... carry on boy, carry on.

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sumtingwong

something was amiss for a long time... and today's the day! when things will be back to normal again, when my mornings will be as beautiful as ever, when my days will be filled with a sweet voice and when again she will be there to pick up my calls whenever I call... till now... i said.. sumtingwong.

Today I also happen to complete my first week at my new job. I am enjoying it but at the same time I can feel the drastic change in my schedule and work life. Its not the same and it will never be the same again.

WHen I look back today, its been only a week and I have made more mistakes then I thought I would. Its not a heartening feeling but I guess this is called the learning process. or better, on-the-job training. I too, had a simple wish of starting off with a bang but have been limited due to my inexperience.

The feeling is dampened for sure and I am upset. May be I am asking too much from my own noble self. May be I am over reacting to this initial failure.

One thing is for sure, i cant go down from here as I have already hit the rock bottom. The only place left to explore it "up", "up" and "higher up".... sky sky oh dear sky.. wait for me as I learn to fly... :)

But as they say in chinese... sumtingwong (some thing is wrong!!)

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retrospect

Its been some time since my last post and there are reasons for that. Someone told me why should people come to your blog and read what is going on in your life and feel interested in the same? Why? I had no answer. I am not a very popular guy or a filmstar that fans will log on to my blog everyday... I m just another guy, working hard to make a decent living, average height but extraordinary dreams. A common face but an escalated vision. So what is that will attract readers to read into my life?

Nothing.

However, I have realised that I dont blog for people to read... i blog to give someone an option to peak into my life. That someone can be anyone who wants to know about any random fellow. Could be you..

This blog is for me to indulge with myself, it is my private time thinking about own self and it is my time to just tell all of you what you dont want to know but what I want to write. The choice is yours. Come back, or, go back.

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Help in finding a lost camera!

okay guys we all know how much we love finding lost phones (expensive ones expecially!) and other articles. But please please think about the ordeal the person goes through who loses the stuff... Could be you someday.. so lets change our age old habit and lets try to help out this girl who lost her camera. I know its next to impossible but we can do our bit atleast.

here is what she has to say:

Hello,
I have lost my camera, An expensive DSLR -Canon 400D, in a black camera bag in an autoriksha in Andheri, it is extermely important that i get it back, EXTREMELY.
i have already approached the cops and the auto union, they all laughed at my possibility of getting it back. Hence, im attempting these alternative methods. I request you to please, please pass this on to as many people as possible.
Also if u have a blog, work for the press or can put this request up anywhere else, i request u to please, please help.
Thankyou so much, y'll!
Contact- Shubhangi singh-9820665691
Kush-9930543703


Gear up for a mission!!

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NO EYE NO TEE WHAT A REVELATION?

We all know hows Indian employers still need to mature and understand the ground realities. HR "professionals" in India feel that they are the ones sealing the fate of the employees and this mindset has a disastrous effect on the organization's image and its market value, but for the HR, tis just another way of showing its muscle power!

We all know that no organization can hold back any employee if he/she wants to quit. But companies are now framing policies with such precision that being under the purvue of legality, they harass the outgoing employees to the core not realizing the fact that this will surely hamper its market value and as the word spreads, less people will join the company and their costs will increase manifold.

This is in context with one such organization I am associated with at this point of time and I vow that I will never come back to it ever in my life again. Media being a very different field where contacts and connections hold more importance for hiring anyone, I can guarantee (and I know most of you will agree with me) that in near future this behavior of this sick organization will have a cascading effect on itself.


This post is meant to be read by people and I really don't care if these guys also read it and stop my final dues and relieving letter. (Trust me I have been threatened for the same!).

I have two basic questions. If an employee joins a new company and feels that the HR mislead him with certain details (important ones) and at the same time he doesn't like the work assigned or the way its done, what he should do? limp or quit? I quit.


Second question is about the company policies and HR's stand on certain issues (keep in mind their muscle power!). This place has this strange policy of not giving you your "quiting month's" salary and making the final payment (including notice period money and a months salary which you weren't paid as u resigned in that month) 45 days after your last day.

Insane I call it.

An effective way of holding back an employee! i love at the speed and cunningness their minds function. Got to learn a lot from these guys I tell you.

Now the HR's stand, During my earlier job, I covered HR and I know that the dept is thr to take care of its human resources and to make their lives comfortable. Here, its opposite, at this place the HR is about harassing the employees and making sure that the company policies are adhered to howsoever insane or rigid it may be. Flexibility or taking care of employees interest doesn't hold anything for these guys.

I pleaded to them that please don't hod back my this month's salary as I m in dire need of money and mind you i quit on the last day of the month and they say that they give salaries on the 5th of every month but they never reach any employee before the 15th and I was told that appraisals too happen at a minimum of 6 months after the due date.


Nope, My plea was rejected. The reason: Its been only a month now and i have already put down my papers. This made me ask another question about an employer and an employee relationship.

How do we bond and create relationships? Think of two scenarios. First, they understood my plea and gave me my hard earned money on its due date. I ll go out and tell my friends how good this place is and how much they care for their employees, new or old is not a concern.


Scenario two: They reject my plea and I tell my friends in media about this place and obviously they all will think twice before joining this place and everyone wants to work at a place where work conditions are good and the management is responsive.

And in media we always see people going back to their previous offices but this is one such place where u swear that coming back will be one hell of a situation.

Anyways, I ll continue with my fight here and hope that you guys stay away from such crooked offices.

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"Instead of developing technology to counter terror, India is looking at the easy way out by blacking out blackberry"

India has been famous or rather infamous for making non-issues into serious controversies and the latest being the Blackberry case. Being the world’s fastest growing IT power, India has busied itself in the realms of deciphering the mails sent via the Blackberry network rather than developing reliable technology to take-on terrorism which in turn, is making full use of the resources available to them, including technology. A classic example can be the Jaipur blasts culprits sending videos of targeted police stations to the media.

Even when the tragedy has struck as recent as a less than a fortnight ago in Jaipur, India is busy redrawing sketches of the accused rather than focusing all energies on developing speedy and fool-proof technology to minimize the attacks.

In the pretext of safety, India still hasn’t managed to seal its airports completely to the terrorists’ threats. With airports being primary and most vulnerable areas of strike, a greater use of technology is required. Terror groups all around the globe are making use of Liquid Explosives (LE) which need special technology to be detected, but India is still oblivious to the fact and continues to maintain a straight face. The methods of making these LEs are readily available on the internet, through legitimate sources as well. With countries like Japan and other European nations deploying the latest technology available to detect these LEs, we still wait for cows to come home. According to the the US National Counter terrorism Centre, India has lost close to 3,800 lives due to terrorist attacks.

It will be interesting to see the role of the Indian government as to how they employ technology to counter terrorism in India. With reports like China hacking into the governmental websites and the government being clueless about it just draws our attention towards the apathy of the Indian government towards the use of better technology. Recently, an Indian embassy’s website was hacked by a layman just to prove the lax in India’s security. The man made a point but India did not bother to correct the mistake, and is instead making life of Research in Motion (RIM) difficult as she believes that all the terrorists are using Blackberry to send emails and a stricter monitoring of the servers are required, more than anything else.

What she fails to realise is that developing this technology will not only help in securing lives of her citizens, but will also be highly useful for public health, law enforcement, or general intelligence purposes.

It is true that the most important contribution of science and technology to curb terrorism is in respect to communications. But clinging on to Blackberry and its transferring its servers to India is no solution to the problem. We need to be mature enough to understand the gravity of the situation and act in a manner which is harmful to the terrorists and not anyone else.

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RIP techie shubh

I can't even imagine where my life is heading... Imagine the Football world cup and the Zidane head-butting fiasco. Ditto for me. No, I mean I wasn't unlucky enough to be brought down on earth by the man himself but you can say that I used it as a metaphor! So today, I "metaphorised" the famous strike!

What happened to me? Well, you know I was never a geek. Never. And I wont be, ever. Studies and me are like Arjun Singh and Venugopal Rao. Never in the same frame. I am still amazed how I managed to wear the graduation robe (no i did not steal and sport it, i earned it!). Oh, I studied BMM! hahaha.. yeah yeah i kn.. I got the answer.

After so many makeovers ( people used to say that I look like a geek!) I now look like a goon. Not a perfect one though but very far from a geek.

But alas, as we say that destiny like a spitted chewing gum stuck on your head. I am in the making of a tech geek.

My latest assignment as a journo is to cover technology. FUCK. A TECH GEEK.

RIP SHUBHASHISH

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"I need my burger," says America

White America, We love you!

We all know that our favorite America needs someone or the other to blame to put their rusting weapons and army to use for their good. Afghanistan, Iraq, kinda South Korea (still trying though!), Iran, and then list will continue until the cows come home. However, there has been a recent entry into this honorable list, a country which hasn't attacked forget ruled for over 2000 years, a country so peaceful that more than a billion kill each other everyday leave alone the time to conspire against anyone else, a place so serene and beautiful that selling masks and setting up a medicine factory will easily make you richer than Warren Buffet, Lakshmi Mittal, Ambani Bros, Bill Gates' entire wealth put together - India.

I heard Condoleeza "Rice" saying that the food shortage faced by the world is due to India, yes, India. The reason? Our population is expanding at such a disastrous rate that we are cutting down on our exports of food products leaving the poor kids of the western world hungry for their burgers and pizzas. Hmm... pretty interesting. Now imagine a scenario where America will announce a war against India for stocking up food items for its own people and not letting America feed its poeple. Bush might make this ultra secret speech of his public in coming days of which I have smuggled a copy, "This is a direct infringement of the rights of the Americans, the first citizens of the world, for food. Its us who have the first right over any food item and oil, both cooking and burning in this world. If any country tries to feed its own people and not America, I, inedible Bush, on behalf of the greatest sucker on the ass of this planet will wage a war. A war for the freedom of food that deserves to be eaten by us, a war for the rightfully hungry cattle of the western world and a war for setting things wrong from right."

So all my fellow Indians, remember that its America's cattle who needs our maize and wheat more than our poor. It is our customary duty to bow to them and feed them with open hands and clean their shit. As we haven't learnt to make right right, don't be surprised if the Indian ass-licking govt tomorrow actually goes on to say that due to the pressures from the western world and to maintain the inflow of FDI into the country so that we could prosper and our economy could grow at 9 percent every year, we have decided to continue the food exports to America and other western countries at prices lower than the minimum wage a laborer gets in India.

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Beijing Lafalympics

Olympics are around the corner and a whole new controversy has erected in wake of the Tibetan protests against the Chinese. Now I am not a very big fan of China, actually speaking not even an ounce let alone the word 'big', but this post is not about China bashing which I don't to indulge openly in but a few valid points according to me, I would like to make.

First, the Olympics are not just games but a holy ritual to protect human identity, moral ethics and safeguarding the rights of every human being alive and dead. Olympics are the soul to the word Sport and a true spirit of being a human supersedes everything else when it comes to the holy games. Now China, touted as the next super-power, given the liberty if we, Indians, let them maintain the lead which I am sure we will not is caught on the wrong side of the pendulum as always. Be it the massacre at Tienanmen square or not letting its citizen know what happening around the world. I mean, I really can't understand what problem the Chinese authorities have with the world?
Except smuggling cheap and imitated mobile phones of the best brands in the world, I can't recollect even a single thing they have done good for anyone! I honestly salute Steven Spielberg and Baichung Bhutia for supporting the Tibetan cause. However, I see a reason for us Indians refusing the games this time. There is only one sport in the entire history of India which won us medals with true honour and dignity - Hockey. Now with India performing poorly in the qualifiers, We know that we are good for nothing and this way we might render sympathy of a few and might as well clear our name from the firing line for not getting a medal. Use Hockey for our own good ;)
According to me, the whole of India should boycott the games and then claim the success of other countries to ourselves as it would be because of our backing out that others were able to earn the medals. Ponder.

The second point I would want to make is that of the free will of a country so beautiful and complete that the monks of Tibet actually sell their Ferrari. They are a free country and China is big brother of the East has no right to muscle its way into the country's political and religious sentiments. In 1959, if my stats are correct, China has signed on the dotted line saying that it will not interfere in the religious and political outlook of Tibet. Then why now? Why all the hype and hoopla about? This is exactly what the Tibetans are asking for, the promise made to be honoured and this is exactly what the Chinese are forgetting. Anyone, please ask them the question why? WHY?

Third and the last point, I urge to the entire world to stand-up against the wrongs and the killings of the innocent taking place in Tibet by the Chinese. Rise to the occasion as we all know what is happening behind the closed doors and take charge of the situation. We all talk about making this world a better place to live-in, so lets begin by boycotting the games completely and rob India's only chance of throwing the medals away for its fake Olympian glory.

Let us all say in one voice - FREE TIBET, NO OLYMPICS and with all the butt of jokes surrounding China at this moment, more than Olympics, its Lafalympics!

Please log on to http://www.beijingolympicsboycott.com/ and register your support for Tibet.

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The corelation between stock market and Cricket!

Actually speaking, I did not want to write this particular blog but as you know that I have quit my job (if you don't then read the earlier post!) and have no work whatsoever to do. Kids in their summer vacation are busier than me as they have some holiday homework to do, but me? Nope. Work was worship, now its just a burden and I am happy to off-load it for some time. I never in my wildest dreams imagined that the word ‘quit’ will be music to my ears!!

Anyways, my empty head hasn't become the devil’s workshop as yet but if it goes with the current Mach 4 speed, you bet that my next post will be as wild as a wild bear and as off-track as Indian railways. And its coming soon.

Stocks and Cricket – any similarities? Well, I realised today, yes. Anyhow the similarities are too far fetched and useless but there are a few! To begin with, both in relation to India cannot be judged. Its like the weather bureau of India. “It ll be sunny outside with maximum humidity touching 78% and no sign of rain.” Actually? Its a hailstorm outside, 98% humid and Sun hides like an Indian old fashioned bride in front of her in-laws. All the assumptions and predictions about Indian stock market and Indian Cricket has to go wrong. Its like an unwritten rule. Section 78 (B) clause 58.4: No matter how positive the game and stocks look, must nosedive is predict to move up and vice-verse.

Its been four magnificent long years since the Indian bull run begun and after an year of me actually studying the market thought of starting with baby steps into investing the markets crashed and the US went into possible recession. Just a day into my investment beginning, dammit, what a strike. You bet if compared to Football, Ronaldo will shy away by the accuracy of the u-turn. Anyways, suddenly out of the blue everyone has started to talk about recession, sub prime crisis and Mr Bernanke is about to be hanged by the neck and Indian investors may follow suit and they blindly ape the west. I hope someone predicts that the markets will continue to crash and just to prove the man wrong they rebound miraculously and leave everyone puzzled like always! Amen.

Now, Cricket. Who could have possibly thought that after putting such a show at the fist test match, India will be bowled out for 76. I mean 76 in just 20 overs, 120 balls flat. A true lazy ass, I woke up at 10 and switched the TV at 12 to see India bat just to be told that we have been all-out for 76. Imagine a week prior, when Sehwag made a world record of maximum runs in a single day, 257, and the test match grossed over 1500 runs. 76. just 76. FCUK. Anymore predictions anyone? Come one take a wild guess as who knows India might just do the opposite? What? Of course they will. They are notorious for that. Cricket or no Cricket, they will prove us wrong every time. Be it winning a tournaments being underdogs of the highest order or losing a match against substituted 11 of Bangladesh.

May Gods grace be upon Stock market and Cricket. I don't have any short positions in Cricket but stocks, yes. I guess, from now on one has to look at Cricket to predict the markets as the basic fundamental of functioning for both of them is merging at a rapid force!! Ponder.

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Before I quit my job!

Its a strange feeling I must admit when you decide to quit. I mean, no more job, no security, no money... its just you and your 'back to beggars' instinct! Imagine a life like nomads, yes! that is what best describes when you quit your job without a new one at hand. And the pleasure your derive after you sign your resignation letter bypasses even the happiness of an over-night superstar signing his first autograph!

Dying to experience this extra ordinary feeling, I have decided to call it quits and boy! I can feel butterflies in my tummies already fluttering in anticipation of a new life waiting to kick me in the ass. All our lives, from school to homes, only one thing has been drilled in our minds, study hard to get a good job, secure your future and blah blah... Eventually everyone does that sooner or later but in the process we fail to experience the thrill attached when you quit your job without any security. The feeling is just like sky diving with no strings attached. Read the conversation between a boss and a junior who is quiting:


Junior (tensed): Boss, can we speak for a minute?
Boss (already sensing the bomb waiting to be exploded): uh, yeah temme.
J (heart-beat pounding): I, i, i.. i mean.. I...
B (suspicious now): Just relax, anything wrong? Any problems?
J (sweating by now): I wanna quit, right now!
B: oh! but why?
J (relived as if peed after 3 days): Just... I don't feel like working anymore. Please let me go.
B: okay.. as you wish.


Pretty short convo and voila mission accomplished! But the adrenaline rush you ll get after this 45 second dialogue will be the best thrills of your lives. Those of you who have done this will agree with me and those who haven't, please go and quit your jobs now!

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HOLI DAY!!!!!

We Indians have an amazing knack of turning deaf to issues suddenly. It is like turning on the lights or turning off, in a snap, just like that, click, kaboom, puff and gone! And we may be scaling new heights everyday in people might say and defend the fact that we are a hardworking lot and intelligent then rest of the world but whenever the talk of productivity comes, we all turn deaf ears, in a flash. "huh, product what?" this is the most common response to the topic of maximizing work.

Being one of the fastest growing economies in the world, I wonder how do we actually manage that given the magnum options of holidays we have at our hands ever month! I purposely did not mention 'year' as I am sure that half of the world might faint looking at the numbers! The entire bunch of holidays they get in their lifetime, we get per year.

Its Holi time and Gawd arent we happy? More than the festival, we, Indians are happy for the fact that three holidays have come together and we can enjoy an over extended weekend. From Thursday to Sunday, its like Christmas for the western world! Holidays holidays and more holidays! What is more amusing that after such a long hiatus we still will say on Monday morning, "God, I dont like to work on Mondays... these Monday morning blues."

Gosh, do we ever like to work? Ever? I think a bigger mystery than solving the complexities of the details of 123 nuclear deal or the Ram Setu row is how we Indians manage to grow our GDP by around 9 percent year after year when we have a millions distractions to our work. 370 days in a year our team alone is playing International Cricket and boy, its ok if we lose our job but missing a Cricket match is surely a strict taboo! No matter what,we cant do that.

I am sure in the coming times, some uselessly employed Indian will definitely file a PIL in the Supreme Court saying to put a ban on all the work happening in India as it distracts us from taking the holidays we are entitled to and hinders us from watching the Cricket! Loss of productivity will be due to working at office and the productivity is the ability to take offs and watching Cricket.

PS: I love Holi, have nothing against it and even used to celebrate till two years back. So, please dont plot to kill me that i wrote against the concept of so many holidays!!

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Taking stocks from the situation

Move over birds and bees as the bull and the bear are here! I bet that this is one topic people are talking about everywhere, adding some sense to the sex - the sensex! My knowledge of the stock market is not very deep-rooted and hence the terms like bear market and bull market actually amuses to the extent that I tried to search for their origin on the internet but alas, couldn't find any :(

Anyways, I think this issue can take a back seat for a few days and a much larger issue has to be taken note of - the nose diving markets all over the world. It is funny how America knowingly or unknowingly control the world. Either through the muscle or by using the dollar, its America all the way. I will give you an example from the world best seller 'Shantaram' which according to me fits this current situation to the T. Remember the lines where Lin comes to know that just for him to enjoy his hot water bathe twice a day, men have to carry bucket full of water on their shoulders to the tank situated on top of India Guest House? Lin feels ashamed of himself that just because of his indulgence and luxurious demand someone has to toil hard in the sun to the extent that he decides to stop his hot water bath. Precisely at this moment, Prabhakar shows him to other side of the coin. The side, grimmer and darker than a night without moon, he tells Lin that just because he wants to have a hot water bath twice a day, the man is able to earn some money by filling the tank everyday. So instead of stopping the indulgence, he should have more of those bathes as that burns the stove in the man's home.

Now, to me this example fits perfectly to what is happening in the world economy. America is Lin and we all are those men who fill the tanks with hot water and survive on the earning. The point to be made is that there was a time when Lin left the guest house and the man must have been jobless till someone else filled Lin's shoes. This time has come for America. We, India, must overthrow the Lin and take control of the situation rather than living on the mercy like rest of the world. It is strange to see how the world markets react to the rate cut in the US.

I mean, even if the slightest of problems cloud upon the US, we feel the jitters like its a butterfly effect of some sorts. Making sense out of the Sensex should be our top priority and overthrowing the US in terms of markets, both sensex and sex should be addressed with a certain degree of seriousness.

Till then, happy trying ;)

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I dont C L

has anyone noticed the ICL? The rebel league begun with much fanfare, garnered noted sponsors but heading nowhere. In Indian Cricket, I have highest regards for Kapil Dev but I think he has got himself in a wrong position here. Born with the intention to give more opportunities to budding cricketers (read: making money through Cricket!), ICL has actually ruined the careers of many young players as the BCCI has distanced itself from the league and ICL players will not make it to the national side, ever. Moreover, the ICL has actually become the earning opportunity for a lot of retired or thrown out players in the world arena. Inzamam, Lara, Cairns, Mcmillan to name a few.

So what exactly is the ICL achieving in the process? Playing o just three substandard grounds and 'nurturing' cricketers... I beg to differ. Time and again we have accused the BCCI for not doing welfare for the players and then we see corporate India in the likes of Zee jump in the game for support. The end result: BCCI launches IPL, a much bigger, grander and magnanimous event sweeping away literally all the money corporate India could ever throw at Cricket in India. Zee, actually speaking has come out as a big loser in the game. Ruined lives of young cricketers and making the game a visual blunder as no one wants to see the retired brigade to run like pregnant ladies and bat like walking with a stick in hand...

On the other hand, I genuinely thank Subhash Chandra for giving us the ICl, otherwise, there wouldnt have been any IPL! The names are confusing and similar to the extent that CEE and PEE sounds similar and rhyme too... (I CEE U PEE or I PEE u CEE) Dont even bother to think what i meant by that! honestly, dont.

Thanking ICL, and eagerly waiting for the IPL to start, this cricket fan is hapy o be born in this era when Cricket is at its peak and many more peaks are left to be conquered but in sight of victory. Everyday is a bliss anc everyday with Cricket is pure heaven. Long live the sport.

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Will he budge, or won't he?

ladies and gentlemen! Its showtime! The most anticipated moment in India's yearly history has arrived! No, this isn't about the Miss India contest but the Annual budget. P Chindambaram is all set to unleash a new fury of taxes on us. I wonder will he think of the hovering elections this time and pay some mercy (read: taxes) on us.

Actually, is there any thing left in India which is not highly taxable? Come on, we can have a quick sneak peak as he cant include that still-lucky-enough-to-be untaxed item into his taxable list at such a short notice! Oh yes! I got one! The taxes themselves! They are'nt taxed as yet.

Be ready, because if nothing else, then this budget might see a new dawn in the history of taxation and Chidambaram will impose 13% taxes on our total tax payments including the extra tax on the already high service and value-added tax.

God's grace be upon us.

SHUBHASHISH

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Once added (Jodha Akbar)

The storms around JA is refusing to die down and the new ones are erupting everyday. I wish the Barren Island was like the Hindi film industry and erupted every now and then. Atleast, we in India, too would have had something to cheer about! However, Indians are very proud and egoistic breed. They just cant digest the fact that we in India dont have a live volcano, so here we have volcanic-like eruptions on Hindi films. Its written in history books that Akbar married a Hindu princess. So what is the debate all about? What wrong did Ashutosh Gowarikar do? Oh yes! I got it, he showed the couple's romance on screen, that too a 3 hour and 40 minute long saga. Indians are very shy of the 'love-shove' and refrain from the topic. Bang! stop the film.

"Akbar Jodha were husband and wife and let them be," says an agitator. "Dont morally impair our younger generation by showing the love between the couple," he further adds.

On the other hand, I dont think that these agitations should stop as they are bread and butter for a lot of us. Its a livelihood and favourite past time for the majority of the unemployed youth of my country who doesnt work or doesnt want to work. These rampages gives them the opportunities to ransack shops and fill their homes with food and TVs! A noble profession i must confess.

The agitation, as to other films, has done good to this otherwise average flick and I can see the time when we will have a separate and flourishing industry in agitation and rampages. Wonder what name will it be called and how much tax will the government impose on their 'work'?

So, dear Finance Minister, please think of the future and announce some incentives and tax-sops for this industry which is in its nascent stage right now.

I hope many a youth, currently unemployed will find gainful employment in this industry and wreck our lives.

Once added, few hundred years ago, Jodha Akbar cant separate, but we will add fuel to illogical controversy and pledge to rewrite the history!

Long live Indians and treachery.

SHUBHASHISH

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When opposites are attracted, Musharraf is distracted

After a long hiatus, Pakistan finally woke up to a new day. It wouldnt be wrong if we say that the country has got a new lease of life. Or is it too early for the statement? Whichever way the tables turn, things wont get better in Pakistan. A spoilt brat has a stage to be corrected after which it is doomed for life. And Pakistan has entered the doom stage. After more than 50 years of independence, the country is still plagued by issues like the military rule and the installation of democracy, with its economy crumbling, its not long before we will witness a great fall of a not-so-great nation. From military rule to supporting terrorism, Pakistan has favoured everything the world has opposed and now they are beginning to reap what they sowed.
I somehow feel that the most memorable events in Musharrafs life would be when he came to India for the Agra summit and fulfilled the wish of his wife, like every others, to visit the Taj Mahal! Otherwise this wouldnt have been possible and overthrowing Nawaz Sharif could be triggered by his wife's constant nagging for a visit to the monument of love! Of all the time he spent as the dictator and now as a dictator-in-disguise, the visit to Agra was his most memorable.
I believe Musharraf is a far-sighted man as from the airplane he was in during his arrest drama a few years ago, he managed to see the chain of events taking place in Pakistan against him and played his cards to offering to buy his ancestral home in India during his visit. He knew that one day he will be thrown out of his own country like he pushed Sharif out like many others. His fate was sealed that very day and he knew it. I appreciate the Indian government for not bowing th Musharraf and not handling him the property. Although we Indians are very famous for o ur friendly gestures to even our enemies, I wonder how that time we succumbed to sanity?

Anyways, it is turning out to be good for India and Pakistan at the moment and Pakistan is creating another milestone in history of the world. I dont think anyone h as ever seen two political parties, one sitting in Opposition in the parliament actually joined hands after the muckracking elections to form a coalition government! Imagine the election scene - trying to win a seat over other and at the end joining hands with the same party!

Well, anything is possible in Pakistan, anything. Future of Musharraf is sealed in the hands of Sharif and I dont think that he will forget what Mush did to him. Revenge is second name to Pakistan and a paki politican is worst than an Osama. May God's grace be on Mush and he may exit soon.

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WHY AM I NOT A CRICKETER?

To read this story I would seriously recommend you to first understand the money cricketers and people associated with the game are making. I know everyone of us want to be cricketers especially after the IPL fiasco! Alas, we are not the lucky ones. Read on as a consolation...

Ever since the commercialisation of the game, I feel, why I am not a cricketer? I mean, WHY? WHY GOD WHY? Oops... I forgot, I am an athiest!
You know this is what India can do to you. Everyone around you in so engrossed in prayers and the love-for-God that even the non-believers are tend to think their way. As we all know that "Hey Bhagwan" is the most loved words of Indians. People who dont believe in the supernatural power are looked down as monkeys [no offence to my fellow Australian dude who managed the second highest bid :)].
Getting back to the main issue - Cricket. The main question which my otherwise non-functional mind is throwing up - How are the bidders going to recover the money? Dont they think that they money spent is just too much to be recovered or even converted into profits in such a short duration?
I guess all these questions are dancing in my mind due to the fact that I, the average Indian Cricket fan, an ex-aspiring cricketer wont benefit in any way possible. We are only left to cry because as such the cricket calendar is packed for the entire lifetime, where is the time to track every match? And now we have the IPL.
I seriously feel that the Indian Eye Doctor Association should file a PIL against the BCCI taking in consideration the long term affects of watching TV non-stop.
Also, the Indian Workers Productivity Association should work a bit and file a PIL too for the loss of productivity that will in the long run and also, according to my erroneous calculations, in the short term too, will affect the productivity.
I see only one positivity in this entire concept! India which is getting divided on the politics of regionalism will get some relief. Imagine a Gujarati playing for Mohali team and a Chattisgarhi playing for Chennai! We have to wait and watch who the people will support and the pattern of the supporters. Will they still stick to regionalism or will they cheer for their favourite star?

Time will tell, and until that, I ll try to find answers to the question that why I am not a cricketer?

SHUBHASHISH

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Moneystorm on Indian Cricket!

Money is raining on Indian Cricket and cricketers are getting wet! I bet an umbrella is the last thing on thier minds in this particular rain. Dhoni is bought for Rs 6 crore Muralitharan for 2.4 crore, Shane Warne for Rs 1.8 crore and Adam Gilchrist for Rs 2.8 crore, among others and the bidding is still in process.

I think the credit for this mega hailstorm must go to the Zee group, for, they were the ones who broke out with this innovative idea and BCCI jumped on the bandwagon. The winner, undoubtedly is the Cricket and Indian Cricket especially. With the kind of money everyone is making from IPL, we will be seeing a lot more wide colgate smiles on everyones faces very soon. Oh! smiles are already flashing!
In this war for Cricket, the entertainment value for the game will be at an all time high and a new era in Cricket is knocking at the door steps for India.

I particularly feel sorry for the Zee group and Kapil Dev, for they thought of corporatising Cricket and making huge money out of it and for the cricketers, who, otherwise had no career left and no options to make money. However, the real spinner in this case too has been the BCCI!

I hope with the IPL, the money flowing in the bags of BCCI will see some good done for Indian Cricket. BCCI is the richest cricket board in the world, with more than 80 percent of the revenue of ICC being generated in India, we have the worst stadiums in the world. Even in this age, our stadiums have poor infrastructure and even the score boards are manually operated. This is just one example from the list and I hope that BCCI will pay heed to the crumbling cricketing infrastructure in India.

All said and done, I dont have high hopes as the Chief of Indian Cricket is a politician and we all know what are Indian politicians are better known for!

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In No Man's Land

On one hand, I have the dilemma of reacting to Raj Thackeray, and, on the other, of dealing with the Profashionals (P). Its been four years since I am on this land of the great Maratha whom I call home. With no intentions of going bac I have decided to give my everything to this place which gave me the most beautiful and ugliest days of my life. And I am just 21 still.

Dear P, even after four years of sincere and honest friendship, I dont know where I faltered as you still dont consider me a part of you. Everyday and every moment I have to fight to prove my connection to you and every single moment of the fight I m reminded of my non-inclusion in the group.

I am hurt beyond repair and left with no choice. I am a Mumbaikar and more than that a part of you but somehow you dont realise that and hurt me time and again. Now, I can feel how it feels to be in the no man's land.

After four years, I still belong to nowhere. I hope those who are not with us anymore atleast felt that I was a part of their lives. Coz I owe my life to all of you no matter what you feel about me.

SHUBHASHISH

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FUCK GOD

People say that time is the best healer... I defer.

People say that destiny is in your hands... I defer.

People say that be the change to change... I still defer.

Its been an year now... what has time healed? Nothing. As the day is progressing, my soul is shivering, my mind is not at peace and my body is giving up on me. Its getting harder to control tears. I cant face the day, the memories, the bodies, the death and the sorrow.

I have only one prayer to make..

Dear God,

Fuck you for giving me a life which is of no use for I couldnt help my friends fight death.
Fuck you for making us so weak and helpless that we look up to you for help every moment in our lives.
Fuck you for being the 'super power'
and,
Finally, fuck you for being God.

If there is someone who is the biggest coward on the face of humanity. its you. Fuck you for always not-being-there.

FUCK YOU.

SHUBHASHISH

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Suffering is happiness, backwards

Being a holiday, i normally don't enjoy the luxury of being at home and lazing... today, was one such memorable day! A late start to my morning, the sun's rays peeping into my room, straight into my eyes, screaming about the pleasure they were extracting from devouring my pleasured sleep. I had to give up. I don't think i enjoy anything more than a lazy, slow and aimless day... But today, still was different as i had work to do. This world in which we live in is excruciating to the plight to a young 21-something guy who doesn't know tad abut taxes but since, he is earning peanuts has to pay the nut in taxes with the shell remaining for him to savour!

Well, this was the start to my beautiful day! file the PAN application. I went to the same road which led to a place which gave me the most beautiful and precious gift of my life and took away the same too, my college. If given a chance i would never go back to the place but alas, I had to as the courier shop and the cyber cafe for print-outs was around that area. Its almost been a year since i went back to my college, the road to nostalgia was long, tricky and teary. I was confused with the choice of emotions i had at hand. I was cheerful yet sad, I was intrigued yet detached. There were many people in an around the campus whom i knew, who never changed places and whom i could say confidently, that they know me.

The air got heavier as i entered the premises. At once my inner-voice commanded me to go back but i continued staring at the vulnerable and content faces of students who were doing exactly what i did for three years. Sometimes i do feel strange for the fact that everyone, at different stages of their lives perform the same old activities going on for decades, or may be centuries. Girls were gossiping and bursting into sudden bursts of laughter, guys checking-out hotties and trying to make a conversation and making a fool out of themselves! Its a vicious circle i must say.

Amidst the crowd i sensed that i was suffering. And precisely then, words of Shantaram hammered through my head - suffering is happiness, backwards.

I was happy reliving the memories for those few seconds in the hell gates that i mustered the courage to enter. And I was happy that the place once was a synonym for heaven and life. The memories are few and affable, not enough for me to last my lifetime but has anyone left me with any other option?

Today, I don't see myself different from the poor living in the inhuman conditions in slums. Living at my fourth floor apartment with the luxuries of being educated and responsible, is haunting me to death. I have always longed to be alone, aloof and distant from people. God never heard me then and I was surrounded with people. Now, when I wanted to be with friends, when i actually understood how it felt to be cared and loved by friends, when i actually realised the meaning of friendship and loved the company, God suddenly decided to listen to my prayers.
In silent tears i feel the guilt of my prayers and my love of loneliness. In light sobbing, i realise the true value of my flesh that is cut and thrown of mercilessly and in dark nights i fancy the wild imagination of the best days of my life. I have sailed through the happy times and now, i m living backwards.

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Denied the right to make money!

Google has denied me the right to make money. The reason - I did not give them my full name. Well, what i gave them was Shubhashish and what they want as a 'full' name is the last name too.

Now, when the government of India has no problem in me dropping my last name what problem does Google has? It is beyond my comprehension. Also, this is a straight attack on my RIGHT TO EXPRESS. My name is solely on my descretion and no Google can tell me what it should be. This kind of silly and immature on their part and something needs to be done about this.

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